Escape the purely crazy Vanilla world and Entice yourself into our part of it. (Xtasia)
While the world may be feeling like it’s falling
into an authoritarianism dystopia - where peaceful protest and free speech is being labelled as a terrorist acts; in our part of the world - our community is becoming bigger and even stronger every day.
Come and have a read & anonymously dive
into the world of kink & swinging with me.
We attended a new kink night - entice at Xstasia in west Birmingham. And although it was a fair few weeks ago now, I spent quite fair time the day after writing about it all, so it was as fresh as my sober mind could capture it.
If you wanted to listen to us discuss it in far less detail than this blog post, the link to the podcast episode is here. Although we do have loads of our usual laid back chatter with loads with loads of possible Segway's but we even managed to keep it a little on track this time. With plenty of very unprofessional chat and banta. And we even managed to talk freely about the whole situation regarding the whole craziness regarding gender identity diversity; which appears to be shaking up the LGBTQ community.. Here's the link
Any way, lets get back to much better dystopia, one where we're consenting to be in hey :)
After a long and complex week, we managed to leave for west Birmingham a little later than we had both liked but not impossibly late. In our minds - we had plenty of time but looking back on it in hindsight, we had put a lot of pleasure on the roads being completely clear. And although we managed to make it half way without any problems; we ran into problems at Luton - which would have been fine if we were heading to penthouse, oh well.
The simplistic and purity that comes during the aftercare part of any type of kink related play is unbelievable played down at times. (It's almost as if 50 shades of grey did to the kink scene - what the Tate affect did to young men's mental health - merely simplifying the complexity to it; indirectly changing the general public's perspective on it. The constant diversity of both subjects can never be, truly simplified. Sadly, that's when we - as a society run into problems, on a collective scale.
That grounding and reconnecting is by far one of our favourite parts. I had Paul on that cross for almost a hour straight last night, anal hook it, paddling his bare bum - in-between kissing every single welt mark right before it started its raising process, stroking it - saying thank you silently to myself. Then again to every single raised piece of flesh. Being completely mindful and present in the process. 10 minutes in and I didn't even notice anyone watching us, it all becomes mere background noise - like a dark and invisible audience. Watching with complete awe.
The darkness no doubt has a key impact on this but once I’m fully in my dominant, lost within my Devine feminine energy, my one focus is the individual who is before me. The Devine feminine became rudely knocked out of play by the dark masculine as the ego of course took over on the 2nd stroll back from the toy table. (The kink events several hosts had brought a substantial offering for people to temporarily explore with) It all happened so fast, it was impossible to practice mindfulness; well in that exact moment anyway.
I very much - like always; being the opportunist sadist that I am, very prematurely invaded someone else's play dynamic.
‘’do you want me to have a whip?’
The words just escaped out of my mouth and as the audience had grown from a 10 to 18 people at that point in time, they all became witness to the smashing of my soon to be - wounded ego. (You see, in that exact moment I should have taken her non response as a decline in consent but I had to ask again. I was stupid you see and didn't want that answer.) Self reflection is a beautiful thing but backwards rationalisation will always pull the wool over your eyes - in the sense that it could change details in what actually happened to make you believe that you were being completely rational; that you were in complete control of your actions, even though - you weren’t. And I knew I wasn’t back then, in that moment in time, like I know I wasn’t now. But learning how to avoid your triggers is sometimes futile in certain situations. It's not worth feeling too bad though. As perverted as it sounds, me and Paul are somewhat connoisseur's of CNC; but obviously only when it's consensual.
Apart from frantically walking around, attempting to start a few conversations and a couple of trips back to our hotel room to temporarily bubble, the next part of the night before we both retired was by far one of the most stunning shows we've ever had the pleasure of seeing live. The collective energy within the room added to the continuously growing sexual tension; like the anticipation felt by Loa was somehow influencing every single person who was watching her. The two host's team had done an amazing job at telling everyone in the club that a show was about to be put on; one that was not to be missed.
(I know because me and Paul were in the smoking area when a lady came out, excitably telling everyone that something was about to take place on the dance floor and I, downplayed it - saying we had of course, seen it all before in London somewhere. I was a right bitch but my ego was trying to sadly claw back some sort of status quo - but I apologised to that beautiful human on Instagram later that night. Maybe as I was experiencing the interaction - it was coming out as blunt and rude, but maybe the reality of it, was far more bratty. That's the crazy thing about hindsight, is we can believe with everything inside of us that we were, coming across as one way but we were actually coming across completely differently)
We walked in from the smoking area and the main show had already started. And with a good 150 people already there, mostly in silence; it was without a doubt time to take advantage of our heights. Although - we still couldn't properly watch it all but we upon occasionally shifting position, we see much better. With every knot, every wrist turn, threading through of the rope had a thousand set of eyes watching, burning the present moment into the very depths of their minds. The foot was 1st, and although we left, which meant we sadly missed the full suspension, the kinbaku we witnessed upon return was beyond breath-taking. Her body's contortions were neatly integrated with neat Ichinawa and a collection of intense ipponnawa.. The finished Yoko Tsuri (side suspension) fuelled by a full set of Shibari was 100% something we've not yet at the pleasure of seeing live in person before and wow!!!
The way the club was set up was perfect, with different (almost segregated wings) for the more popular aspects of bdsm; impact, electric, sensory play - there was this ability to come away from the crowds and to explore almost secretly. Beautiful club, but the people within the club make the environment and honestly the hosts were perfection personified.
We retired to the hotel room above the club, which was only a mere maze away from the club, where we ended up doing something that we hadn't really ever managed to do properly before, well not this intensely - Paul tied me up, and my word - if I was to say that every single cell within my body set upon fire and disappeared into a different dimension, that would be a mere understatement.
Public humiliation has always been a kink and like CNC - it’s not a particularly PG one either. Watching that show earlier must have really triggered the sub part within me. Watching his hands and his fingers work each part of the rope, my body set on fire as if the rope had been set alight. But it wasn't a painful burn - just an enlightening one- like his hands were touching the surface of my skin for the 1st time. (I very rarely ever switch this sub you see. That almost entirely unconscious - level of sacrificing ones conscious walls within my conscious self is, on a interpersonal level is a bubble of vulnerability only allowed for set amount of visits… by my self and by a select few.) Watching all of those eyes focus all of their attention onto two people really kicked of my humiliation and sadist side, that very rarely ever shows it's ugly presence anymore; so maybe that's what brought the submissive side up. Like a perverted mentor - putting the feels out first, to see if it's safe to explore.
"We brought some of our own rope didn't we?" I asked him, after a cute little giggle on my part.
I peered over to him, to watch him wrestle with his clothes to get them off. Although we hadn't brought much rope - the likeliness of us attending a kink event with none- was very slim. Paul's cock throbbed with pure excitement as he placed my arms around my back, while being incredibly gentle to avoid causing my shoulders any unnecessary discomfort. As my eyes refused to leave his; I could feel how mindful he was suddenly becoming; like he had just engaged his Dom daddy position. His eyes became more darkened - like they had become glazed over. His cock still remained at almost full capacity and kept bumping into my chest and shoulders as he continued with some basic Ichinawa behind my back. Another 5 minutes had passed and he was very carefully fucking my mouth - like not forcing it; which for Paul isn't exactly how it usually goes. He knew not to attempt anything to complex - as I could want out any point. I've not exactly got a good track record when it comes to staying still - or staying submissive for that matter. That pure energy, oh that lustful positive vibrational frequency was jumping between the two of us; there was nothing - in that exact moment that was going to switch me back. Although hindsight is crazy thing.
The best part of the being part of the swinging community and the kink community, is with being you and being your authentic self, there will be zero image that you need to maintain. Saying this, you will delight some and disturb others but none of it will concern the truth of your being. For that is where your true power lies, is not caring. Although saying this, when you do fuck up in the moment; it's always best to own it and to apologise, we are, after all fighting battles that no one really truly knows about. So when your unkind, it's best to always say why; as this confirmation becomes a positive affirmation to the individual that was on the receiving end of your unkindness. Meaning you haven't gas lit them in their own experience. This is where, as a collective - our true power lies.
The overall night was amazing from start to finish and considering it's only really in it's infancy (this particular kink event at Xstasia) it was absolutely heaving. It can only continue to grow with popularity - they are both credits to the swinging scene, especially the kink scene. Can't wait to attend again and spend some real time with them.
If You guys are due to stay in the amazing hotel at Xstasia, please be mindful to the fact that the windows are painted - blackout wise, so where we were both under the impression that it was still night time; it was actually coming up to 11am in the morning....Good if you want to bubble and get lost within a small harem of people all weekend; which for the majority of the kink community (and the swinging community too - that's the perfect weekend)
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